As a leader, you have to repeat yourself a lot. People are busy, distracted, overwhelmed, and worrying about a lot of other things. Whatever it is you want to communicate to them, you normally have to say it many times for it to finally break through and sink in—especially the folks who are least engaged. And so, if you’re not very tired of saying it, you have likely not said it enough yet. But how do you repeat yourself over and over again without annoying or boring the people already listening?

In his book, Visioneering, Andy Stanley explains that you need to repeat yourself 21 times in order for your vision and message to really sink in for somebody.

I already repeat myself!

Do you feel like you repeat yourself too much? Do you feel like you’ve talked about the same thing over and over, only to have someone come up to you, shocked as if they’ve never heard it before? There are a few lessons you can learn from this.

1. Yes, you know it and you’ve said it a lot of times, but that doesn’t mean they’ve heard it every single time.
2. A general rule for leaders is, if you’re not tired of saying it, you probably haven’t said it enough.
3. You might think you’ve said it enough because your inner circle understands it. You might be afraid of annoying them by repeating yourself, but then you miss those outside the inner circle who haven’t heard it enough. Just because the most engaged understand, doesn’t mean everyone else does. Push past your inner circle and repeat yourself to those on the outside.
4. Even if your inner circle understands and gets it, doesn’t mean they’ve internalized it enough to share it with others. They still need to hear your message too, so they are capable of passing it on to others (in those outer circles).

How to repeat yourself (21 times or more!) without being annoying

1. You have to earn the right to repeat yourself. If it’s not important, not meaningful, or there’s nothing big at stake, then it’s probably not worth repeating. If it’s convincing and inspiring, then people won’t really be annoyed hearing about it multiple times.
2. Hint: If people are getting annoyed with your message, there might be a problem with it. This can be a good indicator your message needs to be more convincing and inspiring.
3. When you do repeat yourself, make it count. It might be tempting to rush through your message when you’re repeating it for a second or third time. Do the opposite, double down on your message when you repeat it, and say it better and clearer than the first time.
4. Find some ways to creatively repeat yourself. Think of conducting an orchestra, you wouldn’t want only a single instrument playing the same note over and over again. You want harmony. You want different instruments to create a beautiful song together. The same goes for repeating your message. Leaders are like conductors, you have lots of different instruments and notes you can use together to communicate something beautiful.

These concepts should be pervasive because everything your church does should be part of your central goal and overall vision. Every event, message, and activity fits into your mission and is an opportunity to creatively repeat yourself, your vision, and what you are all about.

A Concrete Example

Let’s say you have a big marriage program this upcoming Fall that you want to invite people to. How can you creatively communicate and repeat this invitation to your people?

First Announcement

• Start with a direct announcement on Sunday. Tell people why they should attend and give them all the details.
• Hand out flyers as people are leaving with information in case they were distracted during the announcement.
• Later that day, send a focused email that is only about promoting this marriage program.
• Include a blurb in your bulletin, and maybe put it on the front cover.

Creative Ways to Repeat Yourself

• The following week, include an invitation to the marriage program in your weekly email that contains all your other news and announcements.
• Include another brief reminder during your Sunday announcements.
• Hand out flyers when people are leaving in case they missed them last week.
• The following week, send another standalone email, but with a video testimonial on how someone’s life changed because of this program.
• At Sunday school or CCD, invite the kids to draw pictures of their families and give them to their parents.
• Invite a couple to get up and share why they’re planning to attend the program this year.
• Ask your ministries that couples tend to be involved in to share about the marriage program during their upcoming meetings.
• Give out a free book or pamphlet about marriage on Sunday and include a flyer for the program inside the book.
• Host a launch party like a family movie night to kick off the marriage program.

At this point, your inner circle will understand and probably be signed up for the program, so it’s time to recruit them to have them help invite people in the outer circles to attend.

When you get creative and use different notes to repeat yourself, it helps communicate how important your message is and shows how passionate you are about sharing it with others.

You can say the same thing without saying it the same way. Ultimately, that is how you can repeat yourself without being annoying.

Links from the show

• Did you find Uno? Send us a photo at howdy@findinguno.com.
• Have a general question about church communication? Submit it to our hotline at Findinguno.com/ask-a-question.

Are people ignoring your invitations to things? If so, there are really only four possible reasons. If you’re tired of continually inviting people to participate more and go deeper, but it’s only the same ol’ people who show up, this episode is for you.

Whether it’s an invitation to a party, an invitation to go deeper in faith, or an invitation to try something new, there are four reasons people are ignoring your invitations.

1. Not targeting the right people
2. Ineffective delivery
3. No “Convincing Why”
4. Barriers

Targeting the Right People

Are you pitching stuff to the wrong audience? Are you properly segmenting your lists?

As Aristotle says, “A friend to all is a friend to no one.” If you’re friends with everyone, then what is special about your individual friendships? This logic applies to invitations.

If everyone is invited to everything, then no one, in particular, feels invited. This can be called the invitation paradox — the more people you invite at once, the smaller percentage of people will actually respond to that invitation.

The more an invitation feels catered to a particular audience, the more attractive it is and the more special the recipient feels about being invited.

Effective Delivery

It might seem oversimplified, but are your invitations actually good? Are they short, intriguing, and entertaining? Is there a clear call to action?

It is necessary for an invitation to have effective delivery, good communication practices, and an easy next step.

Convincing Why

Do your invitations have a convincing reason?

Don’t start your invitations with the “What”, start with the “Why”. Why should your people participate? Why would they be better off attending? Why is it important?

The date, time, cost, and other details are all secondary. Get your people’s attention first by telling them “Why” they should attend. Convince them!

Contrast the following invitations.

Invitation 1: Join us for our annual marriage retreat at the church hall on this date at this time, the cost is this amount per couple. It will help refresh your marriage.

Invitation 2: Is your spouse sometimes difficult to live with? (Maybe you’re the difficult one!). Do you struggle to put your marriage ahead of your job or hobbies? When was the last time you hit pause to focus on your marriage? Our annual marriage retreat does just that! Here are the details.

While the first invitation communicates the details, it fails to convince people why they should attend. Start by convincing your people why they should answer the invitation, and then they will be more interested in the details and likely to respond.

Removing Barriers

Have you removed the barriers that might be stopping people from accepting this invitation?

My schedule is too busy — Announce your event earlier so people have more time to plan and prepare.

It costs too much money — Offer discounts, ask for sponsors, or consider lowering your price.

I can’t get a babysitter — Offer child care for families.

If you’re not sure what barriers might exist, simply ask your members! Then you can get proactive about preventing those hurdles in the future and for others.

People Got Church Problems

What are the best strategies for engaging folks that have not returned to attending church post-COVID?

Here are three questions to reflect on:

1. What are you inviting them back to? Most people who have not returned were already drifting out of the church before COVID. Something has to be different to be able to convincingly invite them back. You need to be in mission mode, headed somewhere meaningful, and able to communicate that well.
2. Can you identify who they are? Most people drifted out because they weren’t already integrated into the community. It’s not just a numbers game. If you don’t know the names of the people who left, how can you invite them back? Work to further integrate your people so they don’t drift away in the future, and work together to know and personally invite people back.
3. What are you doing that you can invite them back to? Do something unique that you can invite your people back to that is fun and intriguing. This can open the door to further touch-points with them and can help people get plugged back into the community.

Links from the show

• Matthew Warner explains that these four reasons apply to all invitations, including inviting your leaders to try something new. For more on that, check out our previous episode of The Finding Uno Show: Convincing Your Pastor To Try Something New.
• In the “People Got Church Problems” section, Matthew Warner talks about Flocknote’s partnership with Word on Fire. Learn more about Word on Fire ENGAGE at Flocknote.com/engage.
• Did you find Uno? Send us a photo at howdy@findinguno.com.
• Have a general question about church communication? Submit it to our hotline at Findinguno.com/ask-a-question.

The alarm clock went off at 3:30 am. And so began Peter Shankman’s long, tiring, but very…very surprising work day. What happened next was a masterclass in one of the most important parts of every church’s communications strategy: Listening.

The Peter Shankman Story

Morton’s Steakhouse didn’t do anything herculean or impossible for Peter Shankman. They simply provided dinner for one. The reason it was so amazing was the context in which they did it. They were listening.

Because of their listening and personal touch, Morton’s earned a follower for life in Shankman, and he has gone on to tell thousands of others about how awesome Morton’s is and what they did.

The Power of Listening

Listening is one of the most powerful skills that can help churches grow, evangelize, and communicate.

When you think about your communication strategy, how much does it include listening? Try approaching your communication tools thinking less about how you can use them to tell your people something, and more about how you can use them to better listen to your members.

I Hear Too Much!

You might be thinking: I’m already listening a ton, I listen to constant criticisms, complaints, and unsolicited advice from my people.

While it’s true that church leaders already get constant (often negative) feedback from members and this might make it seem like you’re hearing everyone, this is actually a skewed sample as it only includes the super engaged and squeaky wheels.

It takes deliberate effort to listen to the disengaged people you are trying to reach. This isn’t to encourage creeping around online, social media stalking, or data harvesting — that’s not really listening and doesn’t build trust.

Digital tools can help you ask questions and listen to your members, but they should always lead toward building real relationships with them. It’s by deliberately getting outside of your bubble, asking members questions, and building connections with new people that you can discover the real problems they are facing and how you can better serve them.

Often, church leaders use language very different from what their members are familiar with — so their communications miss the mark. By listening to your people, you can learn their language, hear their struggles, and discover the desires in their hearts. You can then adjust the way you speak so they can better understand you and actually want to listen.

Make sure listening and paying attention are central to your communication strategy.

Links from the show

• Matthew Warner shares one of Flocknote’s Guiding Principles — Delight & Surprise. Learn more about Flocknote’s Governing Virtues and Guiding Principles on our Mission Page.
• Matthew Warner mentions that one way to listen is to send out surveys to your members. Learn how you can do that with Flocknote HERE and HERE.
• Did you find Uno? Send us a photo at howdy@findinguno.com.
• Have a general question about church communication? Submit it to our hotline at Findinguno.com/ask-a-question.